Saving Sawyer
by kaylahhallllll
Summary: It's Sawyer's sixteenth birthday, but also a mournful anniversary for the whole family. How will Sawyer, Lucas, and the rest of the Scotts deal with the aftermath of a horrible tragedy?
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys!**

**This is the first chapter of my very first fanfiction. Your reviews are vital to the continuation of this story! I totally welcome criticism as long as it's constructive, not destructive!**

**I rated this story T to be safe, because it deals with adult themes and tragedies.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing, except for Alan. Alan is my creation. Everything else belongs to the creators of One Tree Hill. **

**Happy Reading and Reviewing!**

**Lucas POV**

You always know when something's wrong with Sawyer Brooke Scott. Anytime she's had a bad day or something doesn't go the way she planned, you can find her either in her room with music blaring or somewhere outside with a pencil and paper. Sometimes all she needs is space, but other times she needs you to hold her and be there for her. I guess the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree, huh?

Today I found her in a cemetery in front of a headstone tears pouring down her face and on her paper. Figuring she might need a little help, I slowly walked up behind her.

"I'll be home soon, Dad," she sniffed before scribbling more words.

"Whatcha got so far?" I realized I caught her off guard when her hand froze over the page, so I took the opportunity to sit down beside her.

"Wha-oh nothing important. Just..." she trailed off before curling into my side and releasing the sob she'd been holding in.

"What's wrong, Sawyer?" I whispered, rubbing her back.

"I miss Jamie, Daddy," she whimpered. I can't say I wasn't expecting this answer. Jamie was my nephew and her cousin, as well as best friend. Last year he died in a car accident on his way home from his last college basketball game. He had been signed to play for the Charleston Chiefs just like his father. We were all proud of him. But Sawyer, his biggest fan, was ecstatic. For four solid months after his death, Peyton; Haley; Nate; little Lydia; Sawyer's brother, Alan; and I tried desperately to pull her out of the depression she had fallen into. It probably wouldn't have been so bad if she wasn't in the car with him.

She still has nightmares and cries that it should have been her, but its nothing compared to what it was. Sawyer went through a stage where all she wanted to do was join her cousin and make things 'right'. She didn't realize how bad it was hurting all of us until her brother found her passed out on the bathroom floor with a bottle of pills in her hand.

**FLASHBACK**

_"Mom! Dad! It's Sissy, hurry!" Alan yelled out in the dead of the night. I sat up straight in the bed, shaking Peyton awake. We shared a wary look before racing towards the sound of our son's voice to find Sawyer unconscious on the cold tile of the bathroom._

_"Lucas, oh my god! Sawyer! Sawyer, can you hear me honey? Luke she's not waking up," Peyton screamed, leaning over her as I stood frozen in the doorway fixated on the sight of our daughter. She was sprawled out on her side. Her pale face, covered with a sheen of sweat and blonde curls, remained motionless except for the faint intake of breath. Her arms, both consumed with scars, drew into her sides at the elbows, sharply. And one of her hands, no longer concealing the blue of her veins, clenched around an empty bottle for pills, like a child clinging to a blanket. A bottle I had filled the previous day. Sawyer, baby, no. Please, no._

_"Peyton, get him out of here," I whispered, reaching into my pocket for my phone to dial 911. _

_Peyton's defiant voice rang out, silencing Alan's sobs."Luke, I'm not leaving her. This is all my fault. She's my daughter. I..."_

_"Peyton," I yelled, desperate to calm my wife's hysterics. "Just get him out here. He doesn't need to see this anymore. Get him dressed, get him in the car, then bring me a blanket for her. Go, Peyton"._

_After I screwed up the phone number to 911 about ten times, I finally heard, "911, what's your emergency?" _

_"Thank you, God! My daughter, she- she won't wake up. Pills. She took pills. All of them. And I don't know how long she's been like this. Our son, he found her and I- I need you to hurry. Please". I gave them my address and within ten minutes they had Sawyer and Peyton in the back of an ambulance. Alan and I followed close behind._

_We were in the waiting room. Alan was asleep in Peyton's lap, as she cried on the phone to Haley, "She tried to kill herself, Hales. My baby tried to end her life. Why would she do this? God, I just want her back. I want my Sawyer back". I buried my head in my hands, propped on my knees. Keith, Jimmy, Quinton, and Jamie. The ones I love that are gone. Hell, the last time I was in this hospital was the day we lost my nephew. But I can't think about that right now._

_ I cannot lose my little girl. We can't lose her. Why didn't I see it earlier? I knew she was hurting. She had never been the same since Jamie died. How did I not know it was this bad? Why didn't I get to her soon enough? I'm her father. I should be able to make this go away._

_Peyton put her phone away and began to stroke Alan's hair with shaky hands. Her watery breaths were rapid, as she tried to control the tears that cascaded down her face. I stared at her and when she met my eyes, they filled with tears again. I had a feeling she was thinking the same thing I was. I pulled her into my side and stroked her face. She sobbed again. She was scared. Scared for our daughter. We stayed this way until the doctor came into the room. Peyton sat up quickly wiping her eyes and searching the doctor's stare for any sign. I stood to shake his hand and question immediately, "How is she?"_

_"We were able to pump her stomach completely and prevent further damage," he began. "However, we don't know yet exactly how much damage the liver has endured. Also, I think you should know this was not the first time she has tried this. We found traces of another drug in her bloodstream". Peyton began to cry again, clutching Alan tighter._

_"Don't worry, Mrs. Scott. We were able to rid her system of that too"._

_"Doctor, where do we go from here? Is she awake? When can we see her?" I questioned, anxious to see her safe._

_"No, she wasn't awake when I left her, but you can see her whenever you like". He smiled, extending his arm towards the ICU, waiting for us to follow him as we shook Alan awake. "It's going to be difficult getting Sawyer back to normal. I suggest therapy. Things aren't going to simply be the same again after we release her in a few days. It might be awhile. It's important that you remember that"._

_At this point, we had reached her room. We stopped in our tracks. Peyton looked up at me. I grabbed her hand and nodded, grasping Alan's slim shoulder. We walk in together, unaware of the Sawyer we would find on the other side._

_"See-Saw," Alan exclaimed once he saw that she was awake, and raced to her. As he shuffled to get beside her in the sterile hospital bed, she kept her head down. But when his arms fell around her waist, her eyes snapped up to meet mine. They were filled with fear. Pain. The kind of hurt you would never wish to see your fifteen year old daughter experience. I'm sure she saw the same in mine._

_Suddenly, her beautiful eyes filled with tears as she buried her face in her brother's shaggy hair. For a moment, I saw the same little girl that used to scream for me after nightmares, and I found myself running to her bed as well, wrapping my arms around her slender frame. Peyton hesitated before sitting on the end of the bed by her feet, suppressing sobs of her own and rubbing her legs, comfortingly. We did indeed had a long road ahead of us._

**END FLASHBACK**

**Okay, that's a wrap for the first chapter. I can't express to you enough how much I NEED you guys to review! I will update as soon as I can. Much love to all of you, kaylahhallllll**

**Instagram: kaylah_hallllll**

**Twitter: KaylahMarieHall (I prefer to be contacted through twitter)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey readers! I'm so sorry that I haven't updated. Long story short, four-day hospital stays and two weeks worth of missing school work makes for a hectic schedule. But I think my life is starting to balance out again. :)**

**To my very first reviewers: **

**1) MaggieFrost: Thank you SO much 3**

**2) anniiie: Thank you, I'm sorry I haven't been able to update sooner :/**

**Also, to the two people who have "favorited", the six people who have followed, and the (insert drum roll here) almost 300 people who have read Saving Sawyer: YOU GUYS ROCK! I love each and every one of you.**

**OH, and I'm such a ditz. I said that the NBA team, the Charleston Chiefs, drafted Jamie like they did with Nathan. However, it was the Charlotte Bobcats. The Charleston Chiefs were not an NBA team. I'm sorry about that mix-up.**

**Please keep reading and reviewing! I need your CONSTRUCTIVE advice. Destructive is not welcome here! Also, feel free to contact me through my twitter: KaylahMarieHall. **

**Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I still own nothing affiliated with the masterpiece that is One Tree Hill. Alan, however, is all mine.**

**Without further ado: Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you...CHAPTER TWO! Enjoy :)**

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**Lucas' POV**

_"I miss Jamie, Daddy," she whimpered. I can't say I wasn't expecting this answer..._

"I know, Sawyer," I whispered. "I miss him, too". I still couldn't believe Jimmy Jam was...dead. Taken from this world only days after his dreams of the NBA came true. It just didn't seem real. Or fair. To any of us.

I let her cry into my shirt without interruption. We've been through this together almost every day since the accident, so I knew that nothing I could say would calm her as much as silence would. Silence was truthful; it didn't lie to comfort you. It let you feel what you felt without giving you false hope. Besides, nothing I could say would bring him back. We were learning to accept that.

When she was able to control her tears, she sat up straight and grabbed her notebook and pen that had fallen to the ground next to Jamie's grave. She took a deep breath and turned to face me. Her brown eyes grew bigger as she asked, "Will you read this, Dad? Will you read what I've written so far?"

Her question caught me off guard. She had never let any of us read her writings before. "Of course, Sawyer! I would love to." I smiled at her. "What's it about, baby girl?"

She gripped the notebook tighter and grimaced. "It's about the...accident. About me and...and Jamie." It took a little while for the two of us to look at each other. Her answer stunned me, even further. For the past year, the topic had been taboo to her. No one brought it up. It was an understood agreement in our family. We didn't want to hurt her. Although I knew that one day, Sawyer would be able to talk about it, I never knew it would be this soon. Then again, Sawyer was always one for surprising people.

I pulled her close and kissed the top of her head, "Whenever you're ready, See-Saw".

She nodded and took a deep breath before handing her tattered spiral notebook to me. I searched her eyes, secretly making sure that she was ready for this. She lifted her chin higher than she had in months and smiled a little. Translation: _It's time, Daddy. _

I nodded and stared at the green cover of her notebook, preparing myself for what was inside. Was I ready for this? That didn't matter. My daughter needed me, so I was just going to have to be ready. I opened it to the first page and began.

_When Jamie was signed, I couldn't have been happier. He had worked so hard at this. He deserved it, but part of me resented the fact that he would be even farther away. Jamie wasn't just my cousin. He was my best friend and I was really missed him when he was away. I think he caught on to this one night at the River Court. "Hey short straw," he called me, before dunking the ball into the net. "I was thinking. I have my last game Friday. You're coming right?"_

_"Duh," I answered automatically, rolling my eyes. _

_He laughed, making another basket, effortlessly. "Maybe you could ride with me afterwards. We could hang out all night, like we used to do. Just you and me, little cuz. Whaddya say?"_

_"You mean it? Not even Alan or Lydia?" I questioned, poorly hiding my excitement._

_"Nope. Just us." He smiled, walking off of the court to sit beside me. To me, he was the perfect mix of both of his parents. When he was on the court, he was like Uncle Nathan. When you put a guitar in his hands, you could easily tell his mother was Haley James Scott. Only, Jamie had something that no one else had. Jamie had this certain spark that made him stand apart from the rest. He was focused, talented, patient, caring, disciplined, funny, and sometimes, he was almost magical. You couldn't help, but notice this._

_"Yeah, totally. That'd be awesome!" This was just what I needed. He was going to be wrapped up in basketball soon, and I was scared I wouldn't be able to spend time with him anymore._

_He hugged me and then punched my arm, jokingly. "I might even let you drive some if you can beat me in a little one-on-one," he grinned, pulling me to the middle of the court._

_I laughed and stole the ball from his now empty hands. "Bring it, Jam." _

_Jamie never let me win. Not even once. "I can't let you win, kid, that's not gonna do you any good. Every little bit closer you get to beating me is how you'll know that you're getting better. Gotta learn, Short Straw," he always said. That's why I knew that it was all me who almost stole his unofficial undefeated River Court championship title that night. We're Scott's; what do you expect?_

_The night of his game, I could almost feel his energy although we weren't even in the same area yet. I imagined that the butterflies in my stomach were nothing compared to the eagles that had to be in his. I was waiting in the kitchen, anxiously tapping my feet, for my family to finish getting ready. "Mom, we've got to go now!" I yelled as my dad and little brother walked in, pulling their sports jackets on. _

_"Just a minute, hun, calm down," she replied from her bathroom, upstairs. I looked at my father and he laughed as he rolled his eyes. We both knew her all too well._

_"Peyton Sawyer," he yelled after her. "If you are not ready in exactly one minute, we are leaving your scrawny butt here!" he threatened, throwing a wink in my direction. Nice try, Dad, but I'm not going to lighten up until we are at the gymnasium. _

_"It's Peyton Scott, actually," she retorted, walking into the room._

_"No wonder Sawyer is so sassy. She gets it honestly," he giggled putting his arms around her. Alan and I shared a look and I shook my head._

_"Ha ha ha, lovebirds. If you're finished, we have a very important game to get to. We will NOT be late! Let's go, now!" I walked up behind my parents who were still embracing and shoved them both towards the garage, grabbing Alan by the shoulder, on the way out the door. They were still laughing as we pulled out of the driveway, but at least I got them out of the house. First victory of the night, accomplished. The next one was all up to Jamie and the Bobcats._

_When we got out of the car, we saw Aunt Haley, Lydia, and Uncle Nathan right away. I jumped into my uncle's basketball-strengthened arms and he laughed, lifting me in the air a bit. We were close. As close as Jamie and Daddy were. I hugged Aunt Haley and Lydia, before we walked into the gym. Everyone I loved was there: Aunt Brooke, Uncle Julian, Jude, and Davis; Aunt Millie, Uncle Mouth, and their son, Tric; Uncle Clay, Aunt Quinn, and Logan; Uncle Skills, Aunt Bevin, Little Nate, and their daughter, Reese; Nanny Deb; Chris and Chase; Fergie and Junk; and even Nana Karen and Andy with my Aunt Lily. Jamie's personal fan club taking up three rows of bleachers. We were ready, and somehow I knew Jamie was, too._

_There was one minute left on the clock in the fourth quarter. We were down by two. My heart was racing, the crowd was on its feet. Jamie looked determined. At the last twenty seconds, he faked the player guarding him and shot from the three-point line. _

_My extended family grabbed each other's hands._

_ All eyes on the ball._

_This was it. The very last goal of his very last college game. He had a fifty-fifty chance in his favor, as well as raw talent. But you never know sometimes._

_And swish. _

_They won! __Jamie became __electric, feeding off the energy from the crowd. What a way to leave a legacy behind at Duke. Aunt Haley and Aunt Brooke were crying. Even Uncle Nate and my parents had a few tears in their eyes. I was speechless, watching my big cousin with a smile plastered to my face. Proud was an understatement. We were all way past proud._

_I grabbed Alan and started dancing around with him and Lydia. The rest of the 'kids' joined in, and eventually even the adults. There was no hiding this energy! Jamie pointed towards us in the crowd and grinned before mouthing, "I love you guys." Then he turned back to celebrate with his teammates. It was the like that packed gymnasium was super-alive. Even the other team. They knew they played a good game, and didn't go down without a fight. That was something they should be proud of, and they were._

_Dad pulled Alan and I in for a hug and Aunt Haley kissed my cheek. I looked over and saw Uncle Nate, grasping Lydia's shoulder, and staring at his son with a look of awe on his face. His face crinkled and his eyes shined with unshed tears. I spotted a few gray areas in his shiny black hair. For as long as I've been alive, Uncle Nathan cared more about his family than himself. He gladly spent most of his life, giving them all the love and everything else they needed. So I couldn't even begin to imagine how happy this made him to see his son living out his dream; the right way. _

_Aunt Haley noticed me looking at him, and turned her head to look at him as well. She smiled softly and turned back to me. "I can't believe it, Sawyer Brooke. I always knew he could do it. He just...amazes me sometimes." I hugged her. I understand exactly what she meant. _

_Afterwards, he walked out of the gym to a crowd of cheering. He grinned, shaking their hands as he passed them. He walked straight into his mom's arms, as she began to cry again. Lydia wrapped her arms around her waist and then Uncle Nathan, unable to resist any longer, joined the hug as well._

_Jamie made his way through his "fan club", hugging all of them. Finally, after he thanked Nana Karen and Andy, he made his way to us. Mom smiled, and pulled him into a hug. "Would you believe me if I told you that I was able to carry you once?" she laughed. _

_"Awe, come on, Aunt Peyton. I bet you could still pick me up," he joked, shooting a crooked smile at Dad, which made all of us giggle. _

_"Hey, you'd break my wife, Jamie," he said, grabbing Jamie's hand and pulling him in for another hug. "What are you trying to say, Uncle Luke," Jamie grinned._

_"Only that you were five the last time she held you. You also weren't a college basketball player then. Nice shot, kid," Dad said, suddenly serious. "We're all really proud of you, Jamie Scott. We love you"._

_"Thanks, Uncle Lucas, that means a lot. I love you guys, too. You know that," he replied, smiling softly._

_Jamie knelt to Alan's height and bumped his fist. "That was awesome, Jamie," Alan said, admiration overflowing in his expression._

_Jamie ruffled his hair before replying, "Thanks, Little Man". Then it was my turn. He hugged me and tugged on my hair._

_"How did you know to fake left when he was blocking you. How did you know he wasn't expecting you to do that?" I blurted out. Not exactly the eloquent congratulations my family had already offered, but he understood._

_"His feet. He had them turned left. If he had known, they would've pointed to the right." It all happened so fast. How did he have time to even notice that? Like I said, Jamie was special._

_I smiled up at him. "You ready, Short Straw?" he asked. I looked to my parents for permission, and they nodded.  
_

_"Already put her stuff in your car, Jamie," Dad said. "Drive careful"._

_"Have fun," Mom smiled, poking my dad in the side. I giggled, then turned to Jamie, who just finished saying goodbye to his parents and Lydia. "I'll race ya," I dared him._

_He narrowed his eyes, jokingly and threw his bag over his shoulder. "Oh, it's on." I laughed and darted toward his car with him close behind. Behind us our family was laughing. Aunt Haley yelled over them, "Wear your seat belts, guys." We reached his car at the same time, and waved back at them, catching our breath before climbing in. This was already the best night. _

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**There we go. I hope you enjoyed it! The next chapter is going to be a bit emotional, so prepare yourselves, haha!**

**Thank you again for everything! Much love, from Mississippi!**

**Please review!**

**- kaylahhallllll **

**twitter: KaylahMarieHall**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys!**

**This chapter has been very difficult for me to write. Everyone who loves One Tree Hill, loves Jamie, and the thought of having him die is heartbreaking. I understand. However, I felt that for this story to have its desired effect, this had to happen. I did, to the best of my ability, make sure that he died with all the grace and dignity he deserved. Please keep that in mind during this chapter.**

**To krhdawg94: You are way too kind! Thank you so much for your feedback. I look forward to seeing your reviews on the future chapters... *hint, hint* haha! :)**

**I think that I should just let Chapter 3 of Saving Sawyer speak for itself, so...**

**Disclaimer: I do not own One Tree Hill. Or its characters. Or the money that the creators have for inventing such a masterpiece.**

**Enjoy and Review - kaylahhallllll**

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Previously on Saving Sawyer:

"Will you this, Dad? Will you read what I've written so far?"

_As soon as we climbed in Jamie's car, he turned the stereo on. __"Really Jamie!" I laughed, at the CD he was listening to._

_"So what, I like the Spice Girls?" he responded, before singing along with the iconic British girl band. "If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends."_

_He got so into the song, he began to dance. So naturally, I was in a fit of hysterics. When the song was over, he turned the volume down and glanced at me._

_"So what's new, Sawyer Brooke?" he questioned._

_"Like I ever have anything interesting going on in my life," I replied, looking out the window. It was true. I usually stayed to myself. Mom said I was like my dad in that aspect . "Broody," I think that's how Aunt Brooke described it. But I did have an...adventure recently, that I hoped my big cousin hadn't caught wind of.  
_

_"Really? Hmm. So what's this I hear about a boy? Conner?" I froze. Here we go._

_"It's nothing, Jamie. It was all just stupid." I muttered, anxious to get him off of this topic. I did not want to have this conversation with him._

_"Is that right? See, I already talked to Mom and she seems to think it was a bigger deal than you're leading me to believe." Uh-oh. Oh, but he wasn't finished yet. "So I got to thinking that if a mere teacher knew what had happened between this boy and my baby cousin, then something definitely wasn't right. So I had a talk with Jude and Davis..." he trailed off._

_"Jamie, it's over, now. I handled it. It's fine." I spoke quickly, knowing that he wasn't going to just let this slide. _

_The expression on his face was now the complete opposite from the happy-go-lucky one he had earlier tonight. "You have exactly two seconds to tell me your side of the story, Sawyer, I mean it."_

_I sighed. "Look, I liked this guy, so we went out. He was under the impression that I was willing to...do stuff, so he tried to get me to," I began. Jamie's hands gripped the steering wheel so tightly, you could see his knuckles turning white. "He wasn't exactly happy when I told him to shove off, so he told the entire school I was easy. It's just some silly high school drama, Jamie, I don't care what they think anyway."_

_Jamie glanced at my arm, and huffed. Oh, crap. He pulled the car into the empty parking lot of Karen's Cafe and put in park before facing me. "Sawyer, I told you to tell me everything that happened." I tried to turn my head to avoid his gaze, but he grabbed my chin to turn me around. "Tell me, now."_

_"He grabbed my arm a little hard, that's it," I replied He was locked in overprotective mode, and I was failing to get him back to normal._

_He dropped his hand to get a napkin out of the console. I was confused until he wet it using a water bottle and wiped the make-up under my eyes away. I cringed when he dabbed away the foundation from my left eye, revealing the yellowing bruise, I wanted to stay under wraps. "And I suppose his fist slipped, huh? Where does he live? He's not going to get away with this." He ran his hand through his hair and then hit the steering wheel._

_"Jamie, I told you I handled..." I began, my words scrambling together.  
_

_"Sawyer, you're my cousin and I am not going to have some dipstick try to force you into something and then put his hands on you. I'm going to kill him. And that's all there is to it. I cannot believe you did not tell me. You know, it doesn't matter, give me his address, and I will handle him." There it was, he was finally becoming irrational, so I knew that I had the upper hand._

_I gave him a minute with his anger, before leaning my head on his shoulder. "Jimmy Jam," I whispered. "I love that you're trying to take care of me, but I promise you. I took care of it. He hasn't tried to bother me since. It's no big deal anymore, okay?"_

_He sighed, before laughing, quietly. Hallelujah, normal Jamie's back! I sat up in my seat. "If you say so, Short Straw," he started. "But if that punk ever tries anything again, you will not be the one to handle it, you got me?"_

_"Yes sir!" I giggled, mockingly. He rolled his eyes, but smiled anyway. "Sawyer, tell me what really happened. You know you can always come to me. And I know this couldn't have been easy for you," he said softly. He was over killing Conner, now he just wanted to be there for me. Which is exactly what I wanted._

_I looked away again, forcing myself not to cry, but failing. He was right, I still wasn't over it. "Jamie, I thought I could trust him. Like, I really thought he was different. He hated pop music, he loved to read, I mean his favorite book was As I Lay Dying by Faulkner for crying out loud. And when we went out, it was okay at first. But afterwards, on the way home, he pulled over, and I got uncomfortable. He tried to kiss me, then he tried a little more, and I just...didn't want to. So I pushed him off and he grabbed my arm and tried to pull me closer to him, but I resisted. That infuriated him. He started yelling at me and calling me a tease and...and he hit me. Then told me to walk home."_

_"He did WHAT? Sawyer, what the hell? Why didn't you call me?" Jamie yelled, obviously not totally dismissive on the idea of hunting Conner down._

_"Jamie, let me finish, okay? I didn't walk home. I sat on the side of the road for a little while after he drove away, throwing rocks. I needed to be alone for a little while anyway so it wasn't so bad. When I wanted to go home, I called Jude. He and his girlfriend, Caroline picked me up. Uncle Julian and Aunt Brooke were out-of-town, so I went over there first, so Caroline could help me cover my eye before I went home. They tried to get me to tell my parents, but I was too...ashamed, I guess. Dad always told me to be careful who I trusted and I had just wasted my first date on that," I laughed bitterly. "Anyway, I begged, and they promised they wouldn't tell anyone. When I got to school Monday, the whole school heard that I let him have what he wanted. I hid in the bathroom most of the day, until Jude sent Caroline in to convince me to come out. She's really nice, by the way. Jude picked a good one this time.__ Anyway, I knew that he wanted me to get mad and end up embarrassing myself, so I didn't By Friday, the rumors died and he had a new victim. Things are fine now, I promise."_

_"How long did you cry over him, Short Straw?" he asked, pulling me into one of his bear hugs. I was silent. I hadn't really stopped. He pulled back to look at me. "Sawyer? You're not still crying over this, are you?" he questioned and I buried my head, as a few tears leaked out of the corner of my eyes._

_"I just feel so stupid, Jamie," I cried, allowing myself to be completely truthful with both Jamie and myself. I felt like the fact that this happened, was my mistake. I should have known. It was ignorant of me to think that the stereotypes didn't apply in Tree Hill. He was attractive, he was charming, and he had a history of getting his way. I should have seen this coming a mile away and stopped it. But I didn't. _

_"Sawyer Brooke Scott! You are not the stupid one in all of this. Look, he's a complete dick who thinks with his dick and is probably going to end up failing out of college after he realizes that his football scholarship won't help him with his classes. He's heading nowhere and you're going places. Just think of him as a bump on your road to becoming a musical prodigy or tomorrow's next classical novelist. Don't waste anymore of your time on him, Sawyer. He's not worth it, he's really not." He smiled and I returned it. He was right. I was dumb for trying to hide this from him, he made me feel better than I had in a week. _

_I smiled and nodded. It was past time to get over this. He tousled my hair and I playfully swatted his hand away. "You're going to be just fine, kid, I'll make sure of that," he promised, and I hugged him one more time._

_""Okay, let's get this party started again," he yelled, before turning the Spice Girls back on, and pulling back on the road, as I wiped my eyes. It was time to focus on having the best night ever with my best friend/cousin._

_"Jamie," I whined. "Give me something I can work with!" He ran his hair through his hair quickly before relenting, and digging for his CD case._

_"You better be glad I love you." he said, with a smile on his face. Soon the Foo Fighter's were blaring through the speakers. Oh, yes._

_"I love you too, big cousin. This is way better," I responded, happily, allowing myself to get into the song, as we pulled up to a red light. While the light glowed red, we jammed along to the guitar solos with our own air guitars and horrible dance moves._

_I've already forgotten what I was wearing that night. I've forgotten how I had my hair fixed. I've even forgotten if I packed my journal with me or not._

_But I will never forget the way he laughed before the light turned green. And I'll never be able to forget the blinding lights of that delivery truck as it ran through the red light and into the driver's side of Jamie's car..._

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**Sorry to leave it as a cliffhanger. I hope you've been able to connect with my fanfiction, so far. One Tree Hill meant a lot to me and got me through some pretty tough situations, so this is my way of making sure that their legacy continues. It's all about empathizing with people, so just remember that people will always need other people. Don't be afraid to be that person for someone who needs it. :)**

** I'll update as soon as I can. I love you, guys! Tell me what you think by commenting, or contact me through twitter: KaylahMarieHall**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey Readers!**

**Are you surprised that I'm updating so soon? It's my gift to you, because Saving Sawyer reached 1000 views! YAY! I love you all for that.**

**I'm really excited about this chapter. I've had this chapter written for a while. It was the first idea I had in my mind that prompted me to write this fanfiction. So I've worked really hard to make it perfect. I hope you enjoy it! I'd love to hear more of your feedback though, so please review or contact me through twitter: KaylahMarieHall.**

**Disclaimer: I checked and unfortunately I still do not own One Tree Hill and all that is affiliated. Shocker, right?**

**Ladies and Gentlemen...Chapter 4.**

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Previously on Saving Sawyer:

I will never forget the way he laughed before the light turned green. And I'll never be able to forget the blinding lights of that delivery truck as it ran through the red light and into the driver's side of Jamie's car.

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_It all happened in three seconds._

_One._

_Jamie didn't even see it. I watched his smile fade when he heard the tires screeching. Before he could even turn his head, the truck hit us._

_Two._

_"Jamie!" I screamed as I watched him slouch towards me, before he flew through the windshield. His seat belt dangling as useless as it became the moment he took it off back at Karen's Cafe. I reached for him and right before my fingers could feel the warmth of his hand, the car jolted to a stop as it collided with the light pole._

_Three._

_My head hit the dash. "Jamie," I whimpered once more, desperately trying to grab hold of him, before everything went black. Darkness prevailed. Happy Birthday to me._

_I never looked at his casket. I refused to see his grave. He was gone. No box or concrete slab could make that bearable._

_From the moment I woke up in the sterile, white hospital room, my perception had drastically changed. For a solid month after that day, the weather was perfect. Not one cloud in that mockingly blue sky. Not one damn cloud. How did the sky not weep?_

_The birds. They chirped endlessly during his funeral. They chirped as Aunt Haley screamed. How were the birds able to speak?_

_The trees danced in the wind like nothing had changed. The breeze moved throughout the town carelessly and child-like. The trees still danced, unaffected, as Uncle Nathan took long swigs of Jack Daniels. How were the trees not writhing with grief?_

_People kept saying things that just didn't make sense. "What a wonderful service," or "It's such a beautiful day." They brought their pies and their sympathy all sealed up in an envelope, and then got on with their care-free lives, able to laugh. Able to smile, while Lydia just tried to understand._

_What was wrong with them? Jamie's gone. We don't have him anymore, and there is nothing beautiful or decent about a world without him in it. How could they not see that? How was the universe not in turmoil without him? How was the world not wrapped in flames from losing him?_

_Why were we the only ones scarred by his death?_

_He's dead. Jame's dead. And I'm still here._

**Lucas's POV**

I closed her notebook gently. I looked over at my daughter, expecting to see her in tears, but instead she smiled softly.

"It's not finished. I still have more to say, but it felt good to at least face it," she whispered, reaching for her green notebook. I nodded, still silent, remembering what it felt like to get that call from Hales in the middle of the night. _"Jamie and Sawyer were in an accident. It's bad, Luke, get here soon." _

Selfishly, most of what I thought about while we waited for answers, was Sawyer. But when the doctor came out and said she was fine, but Jamie had died, it was like he took a match and lit me on fire. Every part of me burned, and afterwards I had to learn how to breathe again with charred lungs. The driver of the truck was wasted. My child was in a coma for a week and my nephew was killed, instantly. But that bastard didn't even get a bruise. He ended up leaving Tree Hill after being released on bail. I wondered if he burst into flames inside when he saw us, like I did, or if he was just too scared that we would have our revenge.

What he didn't understand was that we were too wounded for revenge. We could barely blink without being reminded of the shattering loss. None of us could bear to look at his face long enough to see it through.

Reading Sawyer's side of things, however, makes me feel like I was only touched by pain. She saw him die. Unable to stop it, unable to even say goodbye. I knew it was harder on her. I just didn't understand how hard before. But through all of this, she was strong enough to face her grief. She was able to put it into words and turn it into something people could not only read, but feel.

I threw my arm around her shoulder and pulled her into my side. "Has it gotten any better, Sawyer?" I asked, stroking her hair.

"No, but I'm used to it now, so I can manage it," she answered truthfully. I understood, because the mark Jamie's death had left on me, hadn't even faded.

We sat in silence for a little while, allowing the wind to carry away all the numbness that had kept us talking to simply fill the voids. We allowed ourselves to embrace the silence and let it speak for itself. We gave ourselves permission to feel.

When I stood up and grabbed her hand, she jumped up without hesitation. She knew where we were going and she was ready to get there.

"Got anything special planned for your birthday?" I questioned as we walked back.

"Dad, I know about the party," she laughed, shaking her head.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I winked. "Look, your mom thought it would be good for you. Just act surprised for her, okay?"

She smiled and looped her arm through mine. "You got it. I'm a wonderful actress."

"Speaking of which, did you ever watch that movie I gave to you?" I asked, pausing to avoid a puddle on the sidewalk.

"The one with Julianne Moore?" She squinted as the sun peaked through the tree limbs.

"Yeah, how did you like it?"

We spent the rest of our walk home talking about the movie and all its underlying meanings. She was my daughter and there was no denying that! As we reached the door, I squeezed her hand. "Are you ready for this?"

She nodded and smiled in a way I haven't seen her smile in over a year. "Oh yeah!"

By the time I opened the door and turned on the lights, they all jumped from behind couches and tables. Sawyer grimaced slightly and then smiled, not fully up to celebrating today, but forcing herself to.

"Surprise!"

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**I really hoped you liked it! Please review!**

**I had originally thought of ending it soon, but I've decided that this story has so much more potential to explore. With that being said, I will update as soon as possible!**

**Review!**

**- kaylahhallllll**


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